Rabbit Ears


Sometimes we have a hard time tuning in our lives, as though we are passing through a magnetic anomaly or concentrating our physical self in an area that could be a place considered  opposite of where a lei line would be, permeating bad ju-ju. So during these times we’re a bit like those old TV’s we had with the rabbit ears; the ones we had to keep messing with in order to get even a partial picture on the set. But mostly the channels that came in were simply static–that crackly white noise, which blurred in front of our faces with maybe some echo of a scene behind the black and white lines squiggling on the box in front of us.

Try as we might to move the antennae around (or physically pick them up in desperation), and add  aluminum foil to the end to extend their reach, we’d barely see much, only once in a while–if we were lucky and the weather patterns cooperated. Then lo and behold, an image would form and we could watch the world play out in front of our eyes. We’d sit frozen, captured and greedy because finally everything was in focus–if only for a moment we were mesmerized.

I pass through these moments of clarity where my world feels in focus. Where I feel I have tuned my antennae correctly for once and that I am standing in a place of great rightness. I, too, stop and stare, because it is unusual and crisp and clear. It feels odd at these times, like not quite my self, but more ethereal ready to disappear back into the scrambled and distorted reality I’ve become used to passing through. It is a stunning feeling and gives me pause. At these times I feel outside reality.

So when these times of sharpness come; when the world appears more brilliant and the fuzzy noises that threaten those flickering frames where we see things distinctly are suddenly quiet, it gives hope for one day having a steady stream of these moments. Is it finding the lei line and absorbing its energy? And once there, adjusting the rabbit ears permanently in the position of the clearest existence.

 

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Poem: Closing In


Walking towards a fading rainbow

wondering why heron sits thinking

at the edge of a lake

Grumbling crows don’t make any sense

nor does the dollar for Autumn leaves

Wrong photos sent

but right words said instead

no answer back

Neighbors car looks somehow wrong

but it’s the same

Only comfort comes

from three men

too close in a dream

While awake

the cat keeps stalking

every move

Eyes blurred and bleary

looking for real

It’s all wrapped up

in stuff that’s fake

 

 

 

 

 

 

Poem: Madness Approaches


There is an otter swimming in the tub

and chimps that wear evening gloves

Sometimes a little gray mouse

playing  music with her beloved spouse

Or a drowsy dreamy sloth

sipping upside down chicken broth

And the sleepy lion laying near

is too lazy to really fear

While nearby drying with a towel

found in the bathroom is the owl

In every corner of these rooms

birds chat with Vidal Sassoon

On a chair tucked away in the back

some lumbering bear his toupee so black

Little creepy crawly insect things

with ancient writing on their wings

All these creatures just hanging plain as day

looking like they’re here to stay

Maybe it’s all not so bad

the outside world is just as mad

 

 

 

 

Poem: So Real


Walking imagined 

in paradise lands

of well dreamed corridors 

where truths are revealed 

and grandiose bed fellows 

are ready to woo

with long wished word songs 

given as tender 

Where do they lead

these grasped at beauties

created and carved 

from the stone cold wanting 

The touch of their colors 

and scent through the soul

is so real

so real 

Living in drifts 

floating beyond 

It is Paradise 

Paradise 

and it is so real

Art: Blazing Hope


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Hope, I am perfectly willing to admit, is one of those things I’ve relied far too much on. My life hasn’t maybe been as tidy as I’ve wanted it to be, but I keep thinking it’s OK because I always have that thing called hope. It can be plastered on anything really and comes in handy for so many situations…

For you see, the discussions for me happen pretty much in my own head: over and over. That looping of thoughts, both of all the stuff that I shouldn’t have done–(it doesn’t last for too long anymore)–and that almost immediate glow of hope trying very hard to wipe out those other stale ruminations of the past.

So I talk with myself constantly (sometimes quite out loud)–trying to set the hope free: that burning hope. I figure if I keep this chatter on long enough, maybe eventually it will set ablaze and blast off into reality.

The Music Of The Universe


Lately, in keeping with all the inner work I’ve been doing and with the great changes coming out of the last few years of my life, it has naturally moved me back to the more spiritual side of myself. In my past, the spiritual plane was almost equal to the plane in which I lived on a daily ‘normal’ basis. This meant I often felt very in tune with so much more around me and on a much deeper level: people, animals, the natural landscape and of course: the mystical.

Then, the course of my life got in the way, and this beautiful and magical part of my life slipped away  without me really noticing. The spiritual habits that I had practiced left me; all the ‘unexplained coincidences’ that would so often pop up joyfully in my life seemed to disappear and life just became a dull and routine existence.

Like so many of us, the tether to the unknown–to that thing beyond us–(call it what you may), isn’t always there unless you are really looking or open to it. Many just don’t believe, being simply too rooted in reality.

But we all have our own scopes of what reality may be. And I know that my reality had encompassed many things which could not be explained by scientific or simple explanations. You just had to be there to understand. To have faith in the powers and energies that flow. And I did.

So the time has gently begun to seem right, bit by bit, to reemerge within my spiritual self. To put back on my garland crown and flowing robes and step back into the circle once again. And I feel my power returning like an old friend. It was just waiting for my call.

My dreams have been full of visions, visitations and clarity. I use a dream book that I have to help interpret them and I’ve been writing them down in my journal, along with other long and inspired thoughts about my journey.

My interactions with people feel more purposeful and I am often drawn into deep conversations on a sidewalk with neighbors. Seeing people now brings me warmth rather than anxiety and I’m happy to share these moments and feel they are all meaningful.

Most things now feel part of my plan, that I am drawing all things to me. Some days I pick a tarot card to see what it might say, and often it will reflect what I have been feeling during my meditation. That nothing is random: I am creating this reality around me.

It has a been a very long walk to this place of inner peace; to be able to shrug off the demon within each time it threatens to claw its way to the surface. And now that I am dancing on my spiritual path once again, my peace is sweeter: for finally  I can hear the music of the Universe with my whole soul.

Two Thoughts For The Year


There have been two phrases ringing in my head recently that I feel especially appropriate for this new year and job. I’ve mentioned them before in my blog, but now seems a good time to bring them up again as they’ve been floating around in my brain. They must want to come out, so what better way than to share them with my blogging buddies.
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The first one is ‘we create our own realities’. This is a motto I’ve had for years. While there have been tough times in my life where I certainly didn’t remember it and therefore created some pretty bleak realities for myself, I truly believe that it’s true.

What we believe, think, say and gather around ourselves will become us. It’s a bit like magic. I’m sure we’ve all had those days where we ‘get up on the wrong side of the bed’–the alarm didn’t go off, our coffee spilled, we wore two different colored socks, the car didn’t start etc. From the get go, the day went down hill and didn’t stop.

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But if instead of freaking out about the alarm clock and believing the day was going to spiral down from there, we actually took an extra minute to re-coop and gather ourselves and restart. Would things would get back on track? Yes it is honestly true.

As a medic, I can say that most accidents occurred because of people not paying attention, rushing, stress, not taking time to learn something, anger and other negative things. And it’s been proven that disease can also be caused by stress and negative thinking and healed by the opposite. Even if you don’t believe this, what’s the harm in trying to be different? It can only make your life better. Even the word disease, when you break it down becomes dis-ease. 

Many spiritual practices use the idea of prayer to change things–like prayer circles. What more are these than creating realities? Believing in something to change it–many people together in fact….
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So, we can all do this on small scales for sure, but also believing in world peace and enough food. Why not? Just like Tinkerbells says: Believe!

The other quote I heard last year that I just read again in my journal and felt was so profound was ‘language informs behaviors‘. It’s similar in some ways to the above, but more specific. Words are very powerful tools, as all we bloggers know! That’s why most of us do what we do! They can help or harm. Words can change the path of someone’s life, for good or ill.

What this particular woman was saying though, if you speak prejudice words, then it will shape your behaviors. She was speaking about our politicians. What people say often will show what they will do (or not do). This is important to keep in mind when choosing our officials, friends, partners and anyone we keep near.

Listen with both ears wide open, check for clues! Some people may be subtle in their language, although many aren’t. Our language, whether spoken or written, is what makes us human. We must all try to think before we speak–a lesson that’s been hard-earned for me and one I’m still learning.

So with these two thoughts in mind, I face my year. The goal is to make my reality as positive as possible and make sure my language matches my behaviors. And ultimately that others may find me a decent person.

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Seeking Joy


How many of you believe words make reality? It seems that way to me, especially lately. Some of you may recall the mantra I created a month or so ago. It was short and sweet, but very necessary to my life. It was a very positive paragraph and something I have recited at least twice a day–and sometimes more. Basically a positive affirmation of what I would like to see for myself. And, well, it’s all happening in this short time.

Of course, we all know that positive or negative thoughts/words only lead to the same in actions. This is no great new revelation to anyone. It has come down through the ages. The very act of prayer has been going on for centuries. “Ask and ye shall receive” is a most familiar saying we all may know, whether we go to church or not. Many religions believe that the very act of writing something down or speaking words releases their power. And therefore one must be careful what one asks for as it may not come quite as you ask. We as people know that words can harm or heal, whether or not they say: sticks or stones may hurt my  bones, but words will never hurt me. Ah, not true!

This is why I kept my words quite simple in my mantra. But the simple act of saying it over and over seems to have brought the things for which I ask. Two lines in particular: “I am seeking joy” and “My first priority is love” are coming with delightful abundance. One might think these things have dropped from the sky, but in reality I have created them in my life by focusing on them and drawing them to me.

Numerous books have been written on this subject and have made millions. Positive self talk will in turn bring good. And so the opposite is true. I once read that if you are angry you should try to force yourself to smile because it is almost impossible to stay angry when you are smiling. It’s all about changing one’s reality. And I believe this is possible.

I’m sure you’ve met the people who are eternally grumpy and always draw the negative stuff to them. Or the people who are constantly having bad stuff follow them wherever they go–they draw this black cloud around them. And then there are the people who carry the light around them! I decided I wanted to be like them. And so I made it happen.

Armed with my mantra, my smile, my attitude adjustment and my hope the tide had changed and my world is slowly changing. Some really big things are changing, but even the little things are noticeable. For each one thing that changes, I surround it with gratitude and more positive energy. I want each small movement to grow into something bigger.

My two favorite yoga moves are the sun salute and the warrior pose. I am trying to do these as much as I can now, not only to heal my body, but to ease my spirit. As the sun rises, I know the past is behind me and I greet a new day filled with new possibilities. And the warrior woman within me can face any situation with strength and perseverance and the steady balance of one who has seen empires rise and fall.

So I will continue with my positive speak and keep a clear mind. Not every moment is perfect, but as a warrior, I can shield against the difficult moments armed with my light and the vision I have in my head. And with these tools, some humor and the understanding I may have to lick my wounds now and again–I am confident I will find the joy and love I am seeking.