The Edge

In my experience as a blogger I have been upset and bothered enough to stop only twice. Today was one of those days. Today I felt like I had a Facebook experience honestly, not my usual warm and friendly ‘community’ feeling of the blogging community.

I made the mistake of commenting on a blog recently and was rewarded with a barrage of answers from the blogger, and someone related to her, that was…well, more than I bargained for shall we say. It left me stunned. The thing I commented on actually, if found anywhere else, most likely could have been considered edging very close to a hate statement (in my opinion anyway)–and that is why I commented on it. I said something far more tame than I could have in fact.

In most instances what I saw on the blog, and might have been seen elsewhere, might have been taken down on other sites as offensive. It certainly was to me. But WordPress seems pretty lax about things. They don’t monitor much. And, worse than that, they don’t allow us the ability to block harassing people. So we must endure their comments, no matter how mean they get–self-righteous as these people think they are.

WordPress feels this is an open forum so buck up. Take it. And if you can’t, get out of the game. Make your site private (which can be very tricky).

Well, I guess I understand. But I don’t have to play.

I’ve been thinking for some time about a break anyway. The ideas have been coming hard. One of my favorite bloggers told me maybe to stop writing every day. This seems like a good idea. I just had my five-year anniversary on the site. Five years seems like a good time to try something different. So I may just write when the mood strikes me instead of forcing it all the time, every day.

Sometimes the Universe directs you a certain way. That blogger that won’t go away has directed me. If she won’t go away, then I will–at least now and again. So I say to her: thank you for helping to push me towards this decision that has been hard to make. You tipped me right over the edge…


20 thoughts on “The Edge

  1. I have a whole hell of a lot to say about this. More than you could ever know. This is a super hot button for me. Let me know if you need some support on it. I’ve been put over the edge several times now. It’s not a nice feeling. At. All. I’m here. Stay strong and don’t give up something that pleases you more than it does not.

  2. Totally would love to talk about it. Is that your email listed? If it is, I can write you privately, and even give you my phone. You can’t even believe what happened. It’s cray-cray!!

  3. dont let the “bullies/haters” win. you have as much right to express your views as anyone else. some people feel that just because they can do things on the comupter they can be assholes as it is not being in person.
    ignore ignore ignore

  4. Oh I totally agree. But it’s been time for a bit of a break anyway. I won’t stop altogether, but I like the idea of posting when the mood hits me instead of trying to force something every day. I appreciate your comment and support. There really are some crazies out there!! xo

  5. My friend….You have ALWAYS conducted yourself with grace and respect and wisdom. Others do not. Follow your gut and heart. Any decision that you make just give yourself a bit of time and make it your own. You are strong and wise. Pause and listen my friend. My support is yours no matter what.💕

  6. I’m so sorry you had to deal with that! Some people leave their manners and decency behind when they log onto internet. But maybe the silver lining is that you give yourself permission to blog when you feel like it, rather than trying to stick to a schedule. I gave up the idea of a schedule a while ago, and honestly, I enjoy blogging more now. Just don’t quit altogether, because I’d miss you!

  7. you’re first – always– glad you’re listening to what you need — I so look forward to your blog — and every one of them inspires me in so many ways– and so many other emotions have been touched — i especially admire your courage to make all the changes you decided to make — hard, easy, soft, gritty– you’re an amazing goddess and i support you forever — something that helped me immensely many years ago was a story shared – i think it was by Starhawk – where she described something that happened when she was giving a talk — once she had worked through this for herself – she decided that person was the Goddess of Discord — and from there found her footing again– i’ll see if i can find that story and send it along – love you EL

  8. It was very hard Ann. It was some of the worse stuff I’ve had to endure for a very long time! I even got personal emails! It filled me full of anxiety…it was very strange and reminded me that when we put ourselves out there we open ourselves to a world of stuff. Yes, we do find some lovely people too, but we make ourselves vulnerable, and sadly, it’s the bad people that can do serious damage to our psyche (hopefully nothing more). I’ve been fighting to keep myself stable and this rocked me, so I have to step back. Hopefully I can come back in some form. I don’t know. Time will tell. But I thank you for your support.

  9. Thanks. It was a very crazy thing that happened. The next time we talk I will share it. But it filled me full of anxiety, something I’ve been fighting for a while now El. I can’t afford to be rocked. This person even wrote on my private email account…so it was pretty scary. It got personal. I am been battling my introversion and I suddenly felt very public. I may come back as a private forum and will only invite certain people. We’ll see…xo

  10. There are some really nasty bloggers out there, I’ve seen some nasty blog posts and commentary fields myself. Hopefully it’s a passing face in cyberspace, after all it’s still very young. Anyway, a more relaxed relationship with the blog might be a good thing, though. But don’t go away completely. 😉

  11. It’s still continuing unfortunately. 😦 It’s so sad in the end that people will stay on your blog after repeated attempts to block them just so they can follow comments so they work themselves into a lather about them. Actually, I’m not upset anymore, I only feel sad for this person (people??). They really must be very bored to be bothering with this I suppose. It’s all so silly to threaten me with the police as I’ve stopped interacting with them, yet they continue to harass me. I’ve saved all their comments and emails. It has been suggested that I take it further myself, but I am generally a person that doesn’t want drama or to get people in trouble, especially if there is something going on with them. It could be interesting to post all their stuff that they’ve written to me with their bad language and threats on a blog post and see what the blogging community makes of it?? I wonder how they would feel then…sigh. I just would like them to calm down and just go about their lives.

  12. Sounds like quite a problem. I think if they’re threatening your person in any way, you should call the police, though. If not, the’ll probably get bored sooner or later anyway. I wish you the best, and that things work out as soon as possible.

  13. Veiled threats shall we say and the use of language in a way I would not speak to people. I am hoping you are right… I am considering making my blog private, but then I wouldn’t meet all the wonderful people that I HAVE met. It’s a dilemma. Thanks for your concern.

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