Who Knows/Who Cares?

Sometimes we know too much, sometimes we feel we know nothing at all. Being empowered with information can be a good thing, or it can make us crazy with frustration when we see things we feel aren’t being done correctly or at least up to the standards we believe to be right.

This is the case with me as an ex-paramedic. I’ve had more than I’d like with the health care system lately and am completely discouraged with it all. There are plenty of things I absolutely do know about, and others that may be out of my scope of practice, but that I surely have enough information to sense when something seems out of whack.


So when my Mom called again today to say she was having left arm weakness and tingling, only three weeks post heart attack/stent, I told her to immediately call the ambulance. She was reluctant given the bad experience we all had, but did what I asked. Thank goodness.

This is where my saga gets frustrating. Why does an ambulance take so long? Why can I take a shower and come from farther away and still beat them to the hospital, driving well within the normal speed limit? Seriously?

I mean I knew, having not even seen her, this could possibly be a stroke/TIA or another heart attack. A little speed on their part might be in order. I don’t get it. And don’t even get me started at the hospital. As soon as I saw her, the first thing I did was look at her face and asked her to smile. I noticed facial droop, but the nurse told me no she didn’t see any.


Again I say: seriously? Who would know better? Her or the daughter? It’s nuts. Luckily the Stroke RN and neurologist (when they finally arrived, which wasn’t too fast), agreed with me. Wow, there’s a miracle. So the conclusion was, most likely a TIA (mini-stroke) which had mostly resolved itself by the time she had called me (which wasn’t right away) and they had gotten her to the hospital (they took their time).

Thank goodness it had resolved itself!

So why did it happen? Well, that’s the million dollar question. Most likely due to medication changes from her cardiologist because of the stent. Were these prudent? That I don’t know. This is where knowing too much/too little gets me in trouble. The bigger issue may have been being sent home from the 5 day follow-up visit after the stent because they didn’t think she was booked. They messed up there. Maybe this wouldn’t have happened. Who knows?

Does anybody know anything these days? Is it all a crap shoot? Does anybody care really when it comes down to it?

I’m really beginning to wonder.



16 thoughts on “Who Knows/Who Cares?

  1. Oh, I’m so sorry! That’s got to be so frustrating…you’re already dealing with worry about your mom’s symptoms, and then none of the professionals understand the urgency! I hope your mom is okay. And you’re right, something has to change with our health care system!

  2. Navigating the health care system is NOT what it used to be when the family Doc would come to the house and you had the same one for years. Times have changed and quality care with it. We live longer now but I believe, given my experience with my mom, that the system still stinks especially with elder care. You are on the side of being a loved one trying to advocate for your elderly mom. I cannot imagine doing that with some knowledge and being even more aware of the shortcomings. May God be with you as you continue on this journey. Your mom is so very blessed to have such a wonderful caring daughter and advocate..

  3. Wowed!!! That was really a bad experience.. and cause great anxiety..
    it’s mom we are talking about here..

    I do glad 😁 it turns out alright this time..
    Hopefully you don’t have to go through this ordeal again…

  4. Thanks. I’m worried about her and hope she gets well. Healthcare in this country is very difficult I’m afraid. It’s a sad thing. I appreciate your kindness and support. xo

  5. We all have a rough time navigating it, whether we are the patient or the advocate–sometimes if we are a provider! I hope someday something gives with the system, but as with any bureaucracy it is almost impossible. I am no better a daughter, than she was a mother and she deserves every bit of good care from me and the system, as does every patient. Thanks for your loving words and kindness as always my dear friend. xoxo

  6. I hope your mom will be okay and recover quickly. I can completely understand your frustration. My mother is a nurse and she always says the nurses know more than the doctors because they actually take time to talk to the patients. Your mom is lucky to have you in her corner.

  7. I think it’s slow going at this age…no matter how you slice it. Yes, the RN’s do the bulk of the work for sure, and surely don’t get the bulk of the pay. I’m lucky to have her in my life, so it works both ways. That’s how it works. It’s payback time sister. Thanks for your kind words…<3

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