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I’ve been thinking about loyalty today. Somehow I keep coming up with this vision of a little spindly tree hanging on for dear life. I’m not sure why except that it seems mostly dead. Searching on the internet I found these two quotes that resonated with how I felt.

“Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens.” JR Tolkien, “The Fellowship Of The Rings”.

“A man is not an orange. You can’t eat the fruit and throw the peel away.” Arthur Miller, “Death Of A Salesman”.

It has seemed to me, especially as of late, loyalty is throw away. It isn’t a nurtured thing to be cultivated and treasured. But maybe this is something of the past, or of the older generation? Is it possible younger folks don’t realize the importance of it?

I’ve noticed with them they seem to attach easily and mistake deep friendships for superficial actions or words. True loyalty and caring appears to go unnoticed or maybe just comes to be expected from those of us that are dependable with our giving and kindness. They look to catch phrases or internet relationships and take these for real interactions, but miss planned and highly calculated efforts to help them. This I find distressing and sad.

Is this the wave of the future? Is loyalty dead? Or do we need to start trying to reinvigorate it? My hope is for the latter, but I’m not always sure how to attain it. I’ve tried to by being loyal myself, but somehow this doesn’t seem to work with some. Setting the example only seems to make me get used by the very ones I hope to teach.

But I won’t give up hope that someday these folks will see the depth of real relationships. That they are based on more than mere words and fluff. Who would come if they needed someone in the darkness or if all that was left of them was the peel. Because I know I am that kind of friend–through all of it, not just superficial moments.

I will end with this quote, and I’m not sure where it came from, but it feels appropriate:

“There’s something wrong with your character if opportunity controls your loyalty”.


6 thoughts on “Loyalty

  1. You’re a wise womyn — I just don’t have energy or time to waste on people who choose something else over loyalty — I need to protect myself — which isn’t always easy, but I allowed to many others to such so much energy from me in the past that I’m very cautious and protective now –

    BUt what makes this fun – most of the time- is to be open to forgiveness if the other person is seeking it – but at the same time I do commit to my boundaries –

    It also opens me to having more loyalty – FIERCE loyalty when it’s right for me —

    I appreciate your sharing what sounds like painful stuff for you – and remind you how incredibly important you are to me

    love you — e

  2. It is so true. A very skinny tightrope we walk with this isn’t it? One wants to remain open, but not so that we are wounded. I’m not shut, just cautious as you say. I’m trying to be better on expending my precious energy on those deserving…like you my wonderful and loyal friend! ❤

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